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Monday, February 27, 2006

Walk Softly...

And Carry A Big Fucking Stick. After the day I've had, i'm treading cautiously around my subconscious, before it wakes up and takes my aluminium baseball bat to that 68cm TV on the Kerb outside the house. man, there's nothing like laying waste to a grey TV screen for working out some of the tension of a messed up day. I'm glad there was a beer here, cold and waiting for me. I didn't get to sleep till 4am this morning, and then I spent the whole day reading steven king's Cell and scared that everyone would turn into zombies, and doing little else because of the messed up timetable skills of Honours, the Soviet style inefficiencies of Club Mac, and enduring the un-airconditioned buses that will be my tomb for 6+ hours a week every week.

god i want to tear that TV a new one.
posted by Keegan at 9:28 pm ... 0 comments

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Thursday, February 23, 2006

Georgeous Eyes

Everyone should have a diary like this one. The Cover of the original school blue is hidden behind dozens of stickers - Hahn Premium, Tooheys Pils, Strongbow, Smirnoff, Stolichnaya, even Kirov. Pages are falling everywhere, and there's a couple of photos tucked away. inside, the words are densely packed together, and very often they are out of any sort of context. there's some gems of obvious rumour, some confessions, and a lot of anger (I was a teenager, after all).

There are quite a few pieces that I don't want anyone to ever get close enough to look at. hence this book is a private thing. then again, there's somethings that are special for undefinable reasons. There was a group activity we were forced to do, sat down in random groups of people in our year that we might not normally hang out with. and in one of these we wrote down a compliment for each other. one of the cute girls in the year wrote the title for me, and though for the life of me i can't remember who she was, that she wrote it was one of those things that you hold onto for a long time.

I Want To Write This Thing More Than Ever.
posted by Keegan at 5:40 pm ... 0 comments

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Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Patience Seeking A Better Post

Today it's more about what I'm not writing - it's a very different post to what I'd have written the moment I got back from Hawks Nest. While I love my friends, I've become very attached to living alone, with my brother. Not being in a couple, it has it's upsides. and I could see that in this place where there was a lot of stress being in a couple in previous years.

on a baser level, it's the cost of a relationship I can't afford while I'm at Uni. I've barely got enough to feed/house myself, get to uni and back, without being slugged for $25 to see a movie ($30 with popcorn), dinner, dancing, taxi. even sitting at home watching dvds, or going to the beach, is an extravagance beyond my meager means. it also puts other luxuries out of reach - that new steven king book about zombies which i'd like to read, the dvds of serenity/firefly, or even a mp3 player for the two hour trips to uni.

that's not to say if it happens, i can't make it happen, just that I won't be able to give it all i'd want to. somethings deserve better than a half-assed effort.
posted by Keegan at 2:56 pm ... 0 comments

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Saturday, February 04, 2006

Can't Think Straight

must be that time of the month again... I'd love to find that article again, the one on a scientific study where men and women were asked to keep a mood diary, and it found that not only did men have a monthly mood cycle, but the mood swings were greater than the womens. we just try to hide it more, most of the time. I'm more objective about it now than I might've been at 17, when some days I'd be so moody I... did lots of things. none of which involved human contact.

And i guess i still do that, only I'm not feeling that bad this time round. that's mainly because of the excitement of going to Hawkers, but the combination of both has just ripped my mind out of the time it's meant to be in - August 2000. I can't write a word in without it feeling like it's from the now, or really about the holiday, or about Ez. Yes, a year on and and still think about her every day. Learn from the past and all that, but this summer has just reminded me how boring summers are without a girlfriend, school/uni, or regular work. ah, melancholy. at least I picked up once this summer. can still feel it in the base of my skull, that primitive desire.
posted by Keegan at 4:23 pm ... 0 comments

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Thursday, February 02, 2006

Do You Remember The Days...

Okay, today's question - what kind of slang did we use around yr11 (2000)? I'm guessing 'sweet' and 'cool' are still continual staples, no matter what decade, but I'm hoping one of youse who reads this will remember some totally sweet and cool word, that was infinitely cooler and sweeter than cool or sweet.

There's a sweet westerly blowing a cool wind through the house right now, which might be enough to get me back to writing. I've only pumped out 1000 words this morning, and I'm still asking a lot of questions - I'm starting to realise how much of that time I can't really remember. More accurately, how much thinking it takes to remember small details. I'm settling on setting it in August, or September. It's going to take some diary investigation to figure out when that three week/olympics break was, but it's not as crucial as the emotions. too many damn hormones.

also props to Linz for that Chuck Norris bit. he's so cool, when you look up cool in the dictionary it says;

Cool - (n) - Chuck Norris.
posted by Keegan at 2:43 pm ... 1 comments

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