This (Fresh) Gringo

you know

2009-05-26T00:40:00.002+10:00

This town is empty. I can't make any connections here. the job has no consistent people, no consistent time, and I just want to cry cos i was alone for my birthday. a bottle of scotch. oh great, that'll help me get fucked up on my own. spent two hours shifting a couch on my own. the pizza guy had a hissy fit cos he thought i'd ordered a salad too. mum called eight times cos my cousins were being flooded in yamba. there were msgs and facebook msgs. and i'm really, really fucking alone right now and it's not good for me.

2009-03-03T14:48:00.000+11:00

Bitches Ain't Shit But Hos And Tricks

2008-03-01T10:39:00.002+11:00

I like the Ben Folds version best. I've got my little cavern to hide in, but I can't do it forever. not if it means 40hrs/wk on UK minimum wage doing this mind-numbing, soul-destroying job. it's an isolated place, I knew that when I came, so okay sure, fine, easier to save money when there's nowhere to spend it. makes it easier to travel. just gotta get those managers to understand that if I don't get those days off in a row, I'm gonna take matters into my own hands, and take every day for the rest of time off, and seek alternative employment. but make it seem like it's their idea.

and that simmering pool of rage? at my own idiocy for thinking that you can msg a random a month down the line and get any kind of reply. I do like that brad pitt rule though; "if you were brad pitt, would she use that excuse, and not offer another time for the date?" there's a here and now, should try and focus on that. and next time consider wether an employer can offer a trial period, and think about how dependent you want to be on them. wages, food and board is a lot to expect from a single source.

The Internet Has Moved On.

2007-09-06T21:35:00.000+10:00

Facebook is Blogging for the rest of us. two months have gone by since I last posted anything on this site, and the only thing keeping me from deleting it outright is...
two things.
first thought was that I'd have something you folks still curious - if any of you figured out RSS and left me in your feeder - that there'd be somewhere for me to post curious stories from outside the world. in travelling the state, I've never left the hotel room looking for some strange conversation with an individual.
second thought - there's stuff in the archive relating to the way my mind has changed through my early 20's, and embarassing though it may be to future public self, I still need it alive.

So here I am, pumping a couple of ounces of fresh words into the corpse that is this blog.

What A Lame Game

2007-06-02T22:28:00.000+10:00

Damnz. not that it was a game that counted towards anything, but Australia failed miserably against evil arch enemies Uraguay, who took their first two goal son australian soil at an international level in a godawfully boring game. Admittedly, I was at Jase's place, with six beers in me and a recliner chair that offered a free small fluffly warm dog to entice snoozing, but still, boring game. I find most sport boring, except the world cup which thankfully only occurs once very four years, and Australia plays even less at that level, but I'd hoped I could sit through at least one game without nodding off. my hands are dry and smell of dog, my head's a blur and I'm cold now and hoping I can wake early to get the Doctor Who torrent and watch it before leaving the coast.

I'm thinking I might be blogging a bit more now, even if no-one cares about blogging anymore. it's therapeutic and I like the idea of something of mine archived away from fire in teh internetz.

Things The Internets Has Taught Me

2007-06-02T17:25:00.000+10:00

The Meek Have Inherited The Earth
It's Not Worth Keeping.
Money Doesn't Grow On Trees
Cats Are Teh Lolz
There Is Such A Thing As Too Much Porn
And Kegel Excercises For Men
Friends Are Easy To Make
But You Really Only Want To Connect With The People You Actually Know
There Are Plenty Of Jobs Out There
But I've Got Better Stuff To Do
Like Watch TV
That Just Came Out
You Can Run A Really Tweaked System
And It Still Won't Do What You Want It To.

Sunshine

2007-05-05T20:33:00.000+10:00

This is a real step up from Kensington. when I get to enjoy it, that is. like today, wakin up about nine cos i didn't close the blind all the way, and the sun woke me up - not crazy cat lady, not the numbing roar of traffic. I'm starting to wean my sleep off needing a fan for the dull white noise that could drown out the semis that shuddered past the flat on Todman. Stumble out to the kettle and combine the elements that form coffee, and sit outside on some of the lovely outdoor furniture that seems to magically appear thanks to Kev's girlfriend. open up my newly delivered book from Amazon.com, and soak up the world for a while. actually feel love for the world, instead of those rough days where just existing is an effort.

it seems like I might be getting a shot at travel again, which'll be awesome. back aroudn the country in the company car, eating for free and sleeping in strange hotels with strange... sheets. who knows, I might actually visit a bar or two...

Wymnz r cool!!11!!

2007-04-26T14:25:00.000+10:00

drinking, less so. I've had a string of enjoyable nights, and when that happens I drink more when I go out, which ended up last night in getting to the memory gap stage. at least it was right at the end of the night, but man, wow. it's enough to make me skip tomorrow night anyway. don't wanna be out on the town draining my account when I've got a car to pay off, and a trip to save for.

annoyed at myself as well, for turning into a sleaze. get lucky once and suddenly drunk keegan thinks he's a ladies' man. the swagger is nice, but the behaviour less so.

A Day To Remember

2007-04-17T16:43:00.000+10:00

Wow, Graduated today. And the Virginia thing happened, which I read about just before I left for the ceremony. going to be etched forever, that one, like 9/11.

Moment of respect.

And to think I'm worrying about not getting finance today for my car, and watched Office Space just now, and everyone's walking around like it's a normal day when something like that happens. an individual lets down the whole world, and destroys his fellow man.

And just because it happened in a university on the day I graduated, I for a moment imagined that it was some aberration, and that around the world there aren't millions of humans that have crossed the line beyond civil respect for the lives of others.

Hope that one day I'll be telling my grandkids these stories of the horrors that occurred in my world, and they'll live in a world that makes ours look like a fictional dystopia.

Epic

2007-04-14T19:05:00.000+10:00

Buying a car has got to be one of the most difficult things I've done since I finished my honours thesis. the picking the car bit wasn't hard - it's a Holden Commodore VS, Green with a neat little spoiler.

The tricky bit has been getting finance from an online provider. I started the application process two weeks ago, chose the vehicle a week ago and put down a deposit, and been waiting for the process to come through. there was a sense of urgency for me, as the day drew closer to the point where I had to return the company car. Two months is a pretty good run for free fuel and an e-tag.
So panic struck this Friday when I dropped off the keys, called the finance company, and got told the check wouldn't happen till Tuesday. Graduation day. so turns out I'll be getting a car for my graduation. and a $5000 debt, but shhh. I can ignore that in the moment.

... But Where Are The Strings?

2007-02-22T19:27:00.000+11:00

aah! oh my god, it's been like four days since i had internet access! and dial-up feels like methadone, slowly easing my cravings but never quite bringing the pay-off. i'm writing in a dingy hotel in warners bay, well, actually a quite newish hotel. just had a lovely seafood dish on the company tab, and i'm gonna mellow out for a bit. only worked for two hours today, but drove a heck of along way around the traps to do that work. stopped off at the golden guitar today, for like a minute, to get at least some evidence of my epic journey.

so far, since we got the place, i've spent more nights away from it than i have in it. but still, it'll be good to have somewhere to get back to. hotels get old. at least when i don't have backpackers to drink with.

Blogging again - Living Arrangements

2007-02-12T20:30:00.000+11:00

Been a while, of course. but it's been a good two weeks, so i'm gonna start sharin' again. As my job picks up i'll be travellin' around the state and blogging will be somethin to do waitin around in random hotels between jobs, but today -

on friday, the lease'll be signed, and on saturday we'll have the truck, and by sunday my brother, his girlfriend, and my single self will have moved into our new digs.

shiny, ey?

the photo's from a property in the building - the place we're in, we haven't actually inspected, so kev's been poring over the blueprints trying to figure out exactly which apartment we'll be living in for the twelve month lease. for me though, i gave up caring where or what about a month ago, after several exhausting days of shitty apartments being inspected, I let kev out on his own to pick, well, whatever. The kitchen will be just as shiny in every apartment.

'Splaination.

2007-01-02T19:09:00.000+11:00

Well, the Coast isn't that kind to me. run over, beat up, lost my good thongs and bought a crappy pair. I've worked one shift, and I've had a couple of hangovers. December wasn't one of my best months.

Getting out of this land of horrors won't be terribly difficult, but it's easier to be patient. sorting out the place, the potential person filling the third bedroom all the good places have, and the furniture we lack is just something i gotta wait for.

Work starts up again soon, and I'm more confident about looking for employment in the city when i'm living there, and not stuck with coastal public transport. and hours of commuting. and with a job bringing in enough cash, maybe i'll get a car. but here and now, i'm just waiting.

so I'm not blogging a whole lot, and don't really plan to. back in the city i'll have things to do...

Mmm, Whiskey

2006-11-28T18:36:00.000+11:00

Cruised on over to Chiro this morning, in the swampy heat, and hid inthe library for an hour before my appointment - only to find out Mei hadn't had any patients for two hours. sigh. It brought more confusion over a gossip item as well, the perennial 'are they? aren't they?' and I'm finding myself extremely curious as to the precise nature of a couple's relationship for no real good reason- just gossip. Because I haven't got much myself. I think i've developing a close relationship with a girl, and there's no real urgency on my part to push for anything more than what it is. On thurs I'm spending the night hanging out with my best mate and two of his randoms, which will be at least intriguing.

Applied for a job that would put me in competition with kids who haven't reached their school certificate yet, and tomorrow I'm planning on a trip to the dole office to keep me in alcohol and petrol over the summer. I'm stocking up a bit now, with some hip-flasked sized whiskeys, a pack containing (Chivas Reagal, Jameson's, and Wild Turkey), and I'm fairly sure Chivas will win out, cos that is one seriously tasty way to get drunk.

I'm gonna work on a mix tape to stick in the car on thursday, and work on getting my full license so on my tour of duty on thurs, I can be permitted a pair of lights an hour. please let me pass, I'm dreading a night without even a thimbleful of dutch courage.

oops, a week has gone by...

2006-11-24T11:41:00.000+11:00

Since the last post, I have been to sydney and back to the coast once every day for the whole week. my hands have half a dozen little cuts from work and moving errors, and today is the first day in a long while where i have absolutely nothing htat needs to be done. no work. no moving. I'll probably get on my bike soon, just to fill in time, but right now, I can afford to say hello, and post a little post to this little blog.

actually, seeing as i've got all this time to kill, it's probably time I transferred all that data from the old computer to this laptop. right on, man. oh yeah, and remind me when I've got some cash to buy some components for the old one to make it into a ravenous beast that will devour anything i can dish out. that's right, the cash thing. youth is drying up, and i'm not sure if i want to get a job down here or not, especially if we're going to be back in the city by the last week of jan, for the work that'll be round by then (the Big Day Out, and subsequent sideshows at the Hordern Pavilion).

ah well, I don't really have to think about it today. I'll just go for a ride, ey? ltrs, y'all.

Glassy Eyed, Empty Apartment.

2006-11-17T21:21:00.000+11:00

The Computer's still there, sucking all the bandwith out of the ether it can, and we shall return once more tomorrow to clean all the other crap lying about. not much left now. and then, cleaning my arse off to make it shiny enough to score bond back. that's $1280 I need. for whatever. maybe travel, maybe new furniture.

I'd say more, but glassy eyed as mentioned previous.

Abandoned Furniture.

2006-11-14T22:06:00.000+11:00

A desk finally in ruins. a wardrobe, without a door for several years now, dismembered and discarded on the nature strip. a sofa, remaining bitterly uncomfortable in its last hours to lodge a final protest against it's fate. A monitor that whined too loudly, and got rejected for the older, dependable (yet smaller) screen. a few chairs held together with spit and vinegar, to be discarded as punishment for their excessive consumption of spit and vinegar.

time to take out the trash.

*click* Boom!

Get Up, Stand Up!

2006-11-11T22:34:00.000+11:00

On a spur-of-the-moment decision, thursday saw me leave Kenso for the coast, to catch Blue King Brown in Toukley. Driving about has got me listening to triple J more, and they've been the album of the week. The sound stood out, and I caught an announcer reading out their upcoming gigs, so what the hey. roped Jase into joining me on a school night, and boy was it a fun gig. funkin out like a white boy, and it was that much fun that I bought the CD from their merch stall. yes, paid for music. really. it's got the memories to go with the music now. also props to Mihirangi, the support act, she was awesome with a fantastic approach to working loops into an act as a solo artist. won over the crowd which only barely knew the main act, so that was pretty well done.

Blue King Brown - Beachcomber, Toukley Thursday 11th Nov

Hmm, Supervisor Ey?

2006-11-08T20:11:00.000+11:00

Worked this morning, walked up the hill on the far side of Uni, and I'm starting to get used to the taste of exercise. even got a little endorphin fix halfway up, which was a nice incentive to burn through. really, I'm still very very unfit, but it did provide an enticement. not enough to get me on the bike though. too busy moving the fridge into place to get picked up tomorrow. speaking of tomorrow, going to drag my sorry ass all the way down to Toukley to see Blue King Brown, the funky outfit currently holding triple J's Album of the Week. Jase is maybe up for it, we'll see how we go tomoz at any rate.

Three Dudes - Eastwood Nov. 7th.

Zooming About

2006-11-07T22:48:00.000+11:00

My Irish horse didn't fare so well against a pair of Japs, though I wasn't to know listenin to the race as we hurtled down the freeway to the coast. all over the shop today, going to chiro and then to the coast to drop off kev and collect dad. it's almost 11 and i've a shift in the morning. sigh. here's a nice photo of the vader down the road, i'm gonna be posting more stencil art i've seen on the streets now I've sorted out the transferring of files to phone and vice versa.

'Dark Side' - Taken October 2006, Todman Ave Kensington.

Gwuar...

2006-11-06T20:57:00.000+11:00

oh the agony. I'm so out of shape. tried getting to the top of the hill next to UNSW on me bike, and the pain... I'll stop complaining now. the real problem was I hadn't tightened the handlebars, and gripping tight pulled them loose. had to get Kev to bring the tools and let him ride it back home. still, not the end of the world - get up tomorrow morning, get out there again, and keep trying to get fit. maybe just on flatlands for a while. The going from Woy Woy to Gosford don't have that many hills, so it should be doable. And Kev'll give it a go too. On his bike. still, love the shocks on this thing, don't reckon i could hack a bike without 'em.

I'm sure other things happened this weekend, like hanging out with Third Years in the city after marking them, and going back to the coast in the rain and coming back to hang out with an honours friend to watch 12 episodes of the west wing till 2 in the morning, but riding my bike's captured my imagination for the moment.

wheew!

2006-11-02T20:44:00.000+11:00

rode the shiny new bike, and it was sooo awesome! thrilling to be around all that traffic, and no helmet on. and then cruising through back streets checking out my neighbourhood. the kinda thing i did all the time as a kid back on the coast, but here, now? living on the intersection of two main streets, i've never had to. plus having a car didn't help much either. apart from the, y'know, being able to drive all over the shop.

jericho on now, dissapointing again. yet still i watch.

Shiny New Bike!

2006-10-31T16:34:00.000+11:00

Yay! I bought a bike today, online (it's cheaper) and I should be able to pick it up by the end of the week, about 15km down the road. at $99.95, it cost slightly less than the amount of 5c, 10c, and 20c pieces I had lying around. I'm only working about 15 hours this week, (including the Bernard Fanning concert tonight at the Hordern), so I've got to scrape my pennies together to buy anything trivial. although... a bike costs a lot less than a car. less than two weeks worth of petrol, actually. also all that saving the earth, energy policy, etc etc. Maybe my thesis tummy will fall away.

today I canceled a mailing list, told insurance and energy their services are no longer required, and council that I'll have some trash on the lawn, and they better pick it up or Bam! Ninja style kick upside the head!

20 days, and this place will be empty and ready for inspection. sigh.

Time For A Rewrite

2006-10-30T10:20:00.000+11:00

I bought a new notebook yesterday when we went grocery shopping, and before I knew it i'd put down four pages of notes about where to go to continue writing for The Last Party. I've been talking about it to a few people again, and I'm coming to realise that I can't paint a shiny happy story where everybody wins - because that never happens. really, the human experience rarely reaches that point, and I never did. If this work is to have any long term interest at all, I have to deal with my flaws in there.

A certain government organisation just sent an email this morning, encouraging me to apply for a subsection of aformentioned organisation,which I'm very keen on doing. although my computer just froze while I was typing this, so perhaps I should say no more... It'd change the whole moving out thing though. something to ponder.

Racing Away From Me.

2006-10-28T21:51:00.000+10:00

Looking back on last night, there were about two or three openings for me to make moves on girls. Even realised it in the moment. Just couldn't be arsed. Granted I had partaken a few so my chances of making anything of these openings were slim to none, but right now I've got that much going on, the effort and stress of relations is too daunting.

Had a fantastic time though. great hanging out with Nikki Kim and Jase. Harold Park Funbucks are amazing. A tenner got me three beers, roast beef roll, hamburger and calamari. If I'd wanted more, one lady wanted to pass on her unused foodbucks. Drinking from 5, and home by 11, walking through the city to bed while surrounded by people havin a fun time out on the town. curious situation. But not one I'm unused to.

I'd been thinking about getting a macbook via dad's salary sacrifice and a year's wait. the idea of using something other than the frustration that is microsoft. at least on this hunk of machine. Dell midrange, circa 2002. with a dell monitor circa 1998. It doesn't quite crash, but the idea of running three programs is a bit too much for it to get it's head around, and it has to take a moment to think. sometimes a couple of minutes. And it can't play Tony Hawk's American Wasteland. that's an evolutionary dead-end. moving back means we can hook'er up to dad's current laptop, with it's dvd burning capabilities, and suck this beast's memories clean.

It's a bit mindboggling really. when we did this to the last computer, I had to get a mate round to crack open the case and whack a cd burner in there to remove 10cds worth of mp3s, the sum of the collection downloaded from napster, from burnt cds borrowed, whathaveyou.

This sucka's got 40gig of music. or 10dvds worth. daunting.

So I Have To Drag Myself Out To Hornsby

2006-10-27T10:47:00.000+10:00

Would you believe, when I got my shiny new phone a week ago, The dude had to photocopy my driver's license? and for the past week, I've been staring at the gap in my wallet, wondering what's missing? seriously, it's taken me this long to notice I don't have it, and I shudder to think of all the driving I've done without it on me. last thing I need is to get booked for not having a license.

So, in order to get into Harold Park and whatever other premises we're going to tonight, I need to head back to Hornsby to collect that precious piece of plastic. faaaan-tastic.

Why Does Jericho Have To Suck So Hard?

2006-10-26T21:43:00.000+10:00

I mean, I've seen the concept done so well in other formats. The United States laid to waste by nuclear attacks. A small town, limited supplies, and no contact with the outside world.

but no, they don't riot. they barely steal. they can't even conceive of a communal existence. there's not a fucking zombie in sight.

I think I've been watching for... five episodes or so? not that there's anything to differentiate them. something drastic happens and you hope and pray it's finally all going to go to shit, and then the music swells, people hug, and all the tension and hints at excitement drain away. If it survives long enough, I could drop in 20 weeks from now and it'd be the same damn formula and not a damn think changed.

Seriously, it would be nice to have something else I have to do Thursday nights between 8.30 and 9.30, so I don't end up gravitating to this cock-tease of a show.

time to turn off that animated talk-show host in the background, shut down the browsers, and get back to Battlestar Galactica - Exodus pt2. (304, for those playing at home). though honestly, it's much more exciting when you watch an entire season over the course of a day.

Woah

2006-10-26T21:40:00.000+10:00

Today I went to the Estate Agent, and handed them my written Notice of Termination. we're moving out of this hellhole 20th November. The drug dealing, money lending skank that lives in the apartment building next to us has been at it all day, yelling her head off at whoever is unfortunate enough to cross her path about 'the fucking money' and 'it's about fucking time I started drinking' and cackling like the witch she is.

There's no real need to stay here, what with youth allowance cutting out and my employment situation unable to guarantee rent/food from week to week, and my brother's exams over. so we're heading back to the coast for the summer. Or as I like to think of it, the land of free board, free food, and being stuck in the spare room of my parents place till we move out again. that'll happen by mid january, and we'll be moving out with the Bro's GF, and one of the Bro's friends, a nice girl who I get along with and I'm not particularly attracted to. Shouldn't change the vibe of the living situation too much.

I've been on the net all day apart from the hour I spent walking to the Agent to flourish my devestating letter to a dissapointingly cute receptionist, absolutely gripped by the capabilities of Digg, tweaking Firefox 2.0 to behave more like IE7, but with better capabilities, and revising my CV through Word thanks to a nice guide. i'd draw your attention to the best of the stories I've read today, but I've seen plenty of blogs that just echo everything they like, and I'm trying to figure out what this place is all about.

It's like with the thesis. I had a vague idea of what I wanted to study when I started out, but it wasn't until I had a mission plan that I actually did anything useful. browsing about for interesting facts kills a lot of time, but doesn't help much.

and now other people want the web. we'll fix that with networking at the next place, but for now that means I gotta abandon this, and post again later. maybe before I head out to Harold Park with the crew.

Theis is OVA!

2006-10-20T17:23:00.000+10:00

Hurrah, Whoopie and Whatnot. I finished it on tuesday, got it bound and handed it in on thursday. and started working this morning. not after going on a retail binge, getting stuff that takes up time - couple of DVDs (Scream, Sahara and Evolution [ that thing with david duchovny]), Tony Hawk's American Wasteland (which I can't get to work on this lam3 laptop), and the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy boxset of books for $12, to replace my dad's rotting originals.

But that's not all! another Flashman book, the latest Quarterly Essay, and a shiny new phone (Nokia 6233), and as soon as I get a SD card reader, I can start uploading some better quality, larger photos. and if i feel like spending $100, it'll turn into a 2gig music player. and I can't think of anything else I want from a phone.

Of course, youth is going to run out soon, so i started working again this mornin, and tomorrow after another shift, I'll be sifting through the paper lookin for something to keep me in timewastery.

though really, I'm going to download a guitar book and start practicing again, and I'm gonna get myself a pushbike for a bit of exercise. writing thesis does nothing for the physique. and it'd be nice to ride down to the beach in summer.

And I'm gonna update this more often too. Pinkie Swear.

Back in one more week

2006-10-10T21:26:00.000+10:00

Thesis is due 17th of October. If i waste anymore time at Del.icio.us or Digg, I'll never finish it. after that, stories for al the kiddies. promise. like how i've discovered the tastiness of scotch. And how annoying it is that I can't drink because i lose my writing edge. oh wait. i'm wasting time here! aah! back to it. where was I? oh yeah, Afghanistan. five years on. I'd say that's more indicitive of the failed US foreign policy/energy policy than any delay in building a replacement tower on 'Ground Zero' in the movie parlance the media loves so much.

I Soooo Want One.

2006-09-26T21:53:00.000+10:00

Check This Out. I'd have more to say but I'm avoiding you. that's right, you. why don't you ask someone else why, that's the way you get all your information isn't it?

Eeep.

2006-09-21T22:11:00.000+10:00

wtf, i'm posting at 10pm the night beofre i'm meant to hand in my introduction. do you think it's ready? nope.

Can't You Just Fix It For Me

2006-09-17T18:40:00.000+10:00

Dresden Dolls - Roundhouse - Awesome.

The hat paid off, only there was a limit as to how far me and coote could push it - there wasn't quite the proof of age that would've made us work a little harder to make something of it. as it was, just fun to lift a girl up so she can check out the band. and the dude with the accordion at the start, absolutely brilliant. especially when he came back onstage to do Bon Jovi - Living on a Prayer with the Dresden Dolls. Beer was good too, at least the carlsbergs i had before i came and was forced to down New. god, if you start with good beer, you gotta stick to it. bad beer just seems worse when you know what you're missing.

Nights out cost a lot of lost thesis time, It'd be nice to sober up some, get some dinner into me, and get back into it.

There's Things I Want To Talk About...

2006-09-14T22:23:00.000+10:00

...But here isn't right. I'm not sure they should be talked about. there's a family matter. and a loud angel of many years ago. It's only 10:26. and I have to clear my mind of these things to get thesis done. but these things deserve time.

ah, I dunno.

I'm gonna need a long day at the beach when all this is over. a long way away. with an appropriately sized esky. and something to read that doesn't convince me that america has failed to grasp the unipolar moment. cos right now every little piece of thesis seems to say the end is fuckin' nigh. and we are going to be strange artifacts in a new world - holding on to those little bits of american culture that survive, while our kids swear at us in cantonese, and scoot off to their madrassa on an italian electric scooter.

A lot of other people need the beach too. here's hoping they get to enjoy it.

Oh, Lord.

2006-09-11T21:20:00.000+10:00

So kev's phone's volume knob died, and he's convinced me to use my old n-gage while he borrows mine till they've repaired his. eeww. I mean really. the concept was cool, but the execution was awful. I think only a couple of thousand were sold.

I've been using it for ten minutes, and my thumbs have that familiar ache again. the menu's really frustrating, and I'm just dreading having to pull it out and use it in front of anyone. still, it'll probably only be the next two days I'll be out and using it.

and playing tony hawk, probably.

Cos I'm Lonely, But I Ain't That Lonely Yet

2006-09-09T17:53:00.000+10:00

So just read about this dude who posted a fake female identity on a hook-up site, and then posted the information that people sent within the first 24 hours. another good reason not to hit this place up.

MC Lars'song 'Internet Relationships' has several other reasons - like the 34 yo with a wooden leg who likes to sniff glue, or the 15 yo who 'just has to be 18 how could she not'.

but the main one for me is, that there has to be a better way to meet people. things like that prank show that people are just as likely to hide who they really are online as they are off. most people don't even know what they're really like - I've got no idea how i'd be described by a girl I know telling another to give me a go (It's happened at least once). and then it's a whole other level - how do you know what one person thinks of an individual is the same way another would perceive that same person?

Sometimes a spark'll hit you, like this girl i've seen on the bus and down my street sometimes. absolutely captivating, but is that any measure of how well we'd synch? I might be questioning myself a bit more than i'd normally would given the amount of time I'm spending on my own studying, but hey. whatever. finish thesis, get a lazy job, and go to the beach as much as weather permits. go out when I can. it'll happen whenever it damn well wants to, and not a second before.

We Hardly Knew You...

2006-09-05T19:30:00.000+10:00

I know it was yesterday, but still, mindbendingly devastating news that the most excitable aussie icon to have graced these shores had passed on just off them, victim to the suprisingly fatal shock of a stingray. If anything, he taught us that there were a lot of 'Dain-jah-russ' animals out there, and by crikey you'd better be a trained professional to handle them wild creatures. and even that wasn't enough to save this one from this last attack.

snap of the timbertown sign from one of those traveljobs. could you tell it was timbertown?

Crossing The Rubicon

2006-09-04T22:30:00.000+10:00

I've been watching Rome in my spare time from Thesis that hasn't been spent drinking, recovering from drinking, or at the beach basking in the glorious 28 degrees or in the 20 degree water (I change my mind. swimming on the first day of spring = global warming is good.) and I'm reminded of some reference somewhere that mentions Bush's invasion of Iraq as akin to 'The Crossing of the Rubicon'. When Caesar was returning from Gaul, he was heading back to a senate that wanted to impeach the consul for his illegal war. by crossing the rubicon as a soldier, instead of as a citizen, he disregarded the law and set Rome on the path to a military dictatorship. Bush rejected international law, but really any comparison to Caesar is unfair to the Emperor of Rome. Bush in Iraq is failing every imperial objective in Iraq immensely.

really, if HBO were here, i'd get a job to pay for it. after thesis of course.

Oh yeah, anyway, I went to the Beach with Pete on Sat. first day of spring, and the weather was so gorgeous. if only the apartment would reflect that, we really have to move out of this dank hole. the Rent increase in Nov is totally unjustified. an extra $10 a week may be the straw that breaks our backs, and high time to move out, put kev and jess on a lease to improve their credit rating.

Interview Tomorrow

2006-08-27T21:00:00.000+10:00

at least my head's stopped pounding. don't know how I woulda done last night and a barbeque today, actually thankful it was called off. I'm avoiding thinking about tomorrow, and i probably should be studying the dept. or something.

My avoidance knows no bounds, neither. I watched the entire 2nd season of battlestar galactica friday and saturday, and today I've been putting my effort into Deadwood, a season of which remains to be viewed. too much TV, not enough thesis or job prep. the grad prog starts in early feb, so even if i'm successful in tomorrow's endurance trial, I'm looking at three months where i'm cut from youth, and not yet employed. perhaps enough time to establish myself in canberra, but that's a lot of thinking ahead to do. thesis remains at the heart of things.

Might Just Point Out...

2006-08-21T15:15:00.000+10:00

It wasn't me that got busted by Cootamundra's Finest. I've one point on my license, and not stopping at a level crossing is a three point, $350 fine. there'd be a lot more swearing in this blog if it'd been my license on the line.

Small Town Hustle

2006-08-20T21:01:00.000+10:00

Did a job out past Yass, in a place called Temora. about 4500 villagers all told. the vibe was very different, but it was a nice enough digs to spend a night in, and folks all seemed acquainted with each other. I even got some thesis work done before we headed out, which probably shows more about the shock I got in friday's class than anything else.

Small town cops though, the worst kind of hustle on the worker driving the van. an RBT round the bend from a rail crossing, and when you don't blow over, they bust you for not coming to a complete stop, what with watching the crossing from behind the trees and all. as if you couldn't see the wheat freighters when you'd rolled almost to a complete stop. Just enforcing the law my ass. if you want to bust the drink drivers, park somewhere where it matters, before they wreck themselves on the traintracks. after them, you're just picking on drivers who were aware enough to slow down at the crossing, and too damn late to held the idiots who swerve into the cargo.

Phwoarness

2006-08-17T20:55:00.000+10:00

A whole week, and I've written like 200 words of thesis. I'm not doing the right thing and moving to a different section when i get stuck in my rut, so i bail and thrash some demons in diablo 2 for three hours, then realise it's 1am and i should sleep. I get up around 11-12, and i'm straight on the computer to check email, make sure it's downloading whatever i'm downloading properly, and have breakfast just after 1pm. in that space between 1pm-6pm (simpsons) I have time to study, and i usually get at it with a cup of tea in hand, and then freeze up. there's so fucking much to go, and I don't know where I'm to start.

doing a chapter at a time will only work if i can keep at it. but i can't. so probably time i got back to doing whatever i can whenever i can.

peace out.

Underworld - Born Slippy

2006-08-15T22:42:00.000+10:00

there's a song that Troppo plays at the end of the night, and it's a melancholy way of telling all the patrons that in the next five minutes, the lights are going to come on and, having lasted this long, you will be going home alone. Not being alone at this point in the night, five minutes after when the lights come on, patrons often change their minds about how bad being alone really is.

Spent the arvo with jase at uni, playing cards and drinkin a few beers, having a good chat and just forgetting thesis for a couple of hours, even though i've spent two days in port mac working , and three on the coast bludging, when i should've been working on this bloody chapter. tomorrow then. when i'm not still drunk like now. it's a good way to spend a tuesday.

music hints - Lily Allen is absolutely awesome, if all pop was as fresh and alive as her work, then i might listen to top 40 once in a while. Peeping Tom is the new stuff from that dude from Faith No More, and it's the kind of work that pushes everyone else forward a bit further, it's amazing what is possible with music now. then again, i'm halfway through downloading the Stubbs the Zombie Soundtrack, which i'm hoping is a good set of 1950's covers by a pretty good range of bands (dandy warhols, ben kweller, death cab for cutie).

I guess things are going on in my world, and i should post more. sometimes the flu really gets to you thou. it's aaaalmost over though. i think. hope. please.

Strokes Tonight

2006-08-04T16:41:00.000+10:00

Baby, It's Cold Outside. I just want to stay snuggled up in my bed with my spiffy new sheets and my stack of books I bought this week, part of the replacement theraputic shopping to alleviate my delayed car syndrome. was out in homebush this morning doing chair covers again, being messed about by security so much that our boss (who just gave me an excellent reference) gave up and sent all eight lads home, cos there was no way we'd get around to doing the millenium room (biggest corporate area in telstra stadium) even if we hung about for four hours. that and the wrestlers in the Acer Arena were too scared to allow anyone onsite, so no efforts to be made there either. woulda been one of the easiest shifts I've had out there, if it wasn't for the rain and the flu.

which is fading away, thank the maker. still would rather pass out in my bed than work, both for money and for thesis. chapter still slowly coming along, much slower than due date is.

Stupid Cold

2006-07-30T21:35:00.000+10:00

Forgot what these were like. i think the pressure attacked my thingy. thing filled with phlegm that hurts. throat. there's a thousand words tomorrow that i just have no idea what is needed to be written, and then a chapter's due this time next week. gark. this sucks. not nearly as much as sky captain and the world of tomorrow - rented it, and it just failed miserably. coulda been a good movie without those actors or that plot or these effects...

yuck. clean my throat out.

DJ Shadow, Peeping Tom

2006-07-24T00:36:00.000+10:00

Sigh, Kev's off at splendour in the grass, and for the trip up he loaded my Nano with tunes, and left me hangin dry when it comes to listening to music. remember Faith No More? yeah, awesome from the 90s. well the singer from that's just brought out something with an outfit called Peeping Tom, and it's really quality sounds, as I was reminded when I checked them out on Rage Friday Night.

So after acquiring a copy of the album, I'm stuck for listening because of this shitty box that's... almost four years old now. wow. I'm suprised it's still running. the computer that is. I know where my Tax refund's going.

Worked at DJ Shadow tonight, and unsuprisingly it was low in comparison to Wolfmother. but still, better than I expected, there were some decent beats flowing out into the foyer. and a lotta cute girls to smile at, smiling back. life is good, I should stop sulking. I'd write up our adventures in the city last night, except they were hardly memorable. one day it will be quality.

Magic Anti-Headache Water

2006-07-22T00:37:00.000+10:00

gimme a mimmick... *sips* aaaah. so where was I? oh yeah, so last night I got sent home just after wolfmother got started, i didn't mind cos well, i'm gonna be working shitloads and i would like some youth allowance please. but tonight, WOOOO!

I was outside till they came on round 9.30, and then i got sent to an inside bar where I got to work to the hottest fucking band in the world. the Zepplin of our time. no-one in the past five yearth has been this fucking rock, without having started like a decade earlier. despite the frustrations with my register, which with all the random prices i was charging people meant I had to be out to some degree, it was still the best gig I've been on the inside for. beats Kanye, even Grinspoon.

Fuck I Love This Job. Sunday - DJ Shadow. 27th-30th : Sexpo.

Tying A Knot...

2006-07-20T14:11:00.000+10:00

Okay, something that kinda disturbed me cos I hadn't thought anyone would really consider it an issue... I was reading this article in the Washington Post, and a line confused me, where they mention that some anaetha... Anethesiologists refused to participate in sterilization procedures. Thinking, "so what, they don't wash their hands? That's kinda gross."

then I look up the word, and see that other than cleanliness, the term sterilization also refers to vasectomies and tube tying. Sure I can understand Catholics not wanting to have the operation done on themselves, but what gives them the right to refuse me treatment? (20 odd years down the road when there's a few too many sprouts running about already)

It's one of those concerns again, that Christianity, along with Islam, is a proselytizing religion, and there's something deep within the mindset that makes forcing your morals on someone else somehow legitimate.

So a Catholic Anethesiologist, the only one in a 200mi radius, serving an entire community of non-catholics, has the power to refuse these operations to that community? there's something wrong with that.

Something Due This Way Comes

2006-07-19T22:58:00.000+10:00

So I met with my de-facto advisor today (what with the regular guy stuck doing appearances on the ABC over this whole Lebanon schamozzle, and organising cruises off the coast of Morrocco), and got a solid critique of my progress so far. research level - good. organisation - bad. I've got three weeks before meeting again, by which time I'm meant to have a whole chapter ready, as well as a more accurately planned out plan. the order i had was shuffled about, and a whole layer of things that make it look more professional than a first year essay stretched out to 15,000 words.

The Biggest Hurdle? 'accidentally' buying Diablo 2. it's so addictive, i should've only been able to get it through this guy that a friend of a friend knows who knows another guy who might be able to hook me up with this shit. just one more level up, then i'll get down to thesis. I can quit anytime.

Wolfmother tomorrow night, fingers crossed I'm on an inside bar for at least one of the two gigs.

Confusing State of Affairs.

2006-07-18T11:34:00.000+10:00

Mixed Signals. I'm picking up good vibrations, and she's picking up good friend vibrations. okay, sure, I'll hold my usual thoughts, and see if she actually means friend, cos i'm willing to do that. i've got a good friend who happens to be a girl already, and that's worked out fine despite only catching up maybe once a month, besides the 400 msgs each month. and I love her as a friend. that's fair, and it's legit.

then there's the numbers in my phone of girls who said they just wanted to be friends and i never heard from them again. if you don't think it felt right, just say so.

really the only thing i should be committing to right now is working harder on thesis. a big solid object of proof that i didn't waste this year entirely.

Zidane

2006-07-15T16:02:00.000+10:00

It's old news now, but if you link on over This Way, you'll see a couple of different takes on Zidane's red card headbutt in the dying minutes of the World Cup. particularly like the French view, where the Italian walks into a lamp post.

Msgs (text) for me are kind of like cigarettes. I'm a 40-a-day man, but I'm trying to cut down. the tiny rush though, it's brillant, don't feel stressed when I'm only a message away from letting someone know i'm thinkin about them, and they reply in return. It's probably not that great for my health, but i'm not likely to die from it anytime soon.

Headed up north again tomorrow, for another stocktakin' job. thank the maker for inventing the iPod. Oh yeah, and This is the kind of car I'm looking at buyin in the next couple of weeks, tidy little number, if a bit old and all...

Woah

2006-07-13T17:51:00.000+10:00

lots to say, not much will be said. lets just say I've got a smile on my face. Car on the way, someone to be a someone around, a few new clothes, and a vibe that I can still write, thesis is looking strong. not so worried that what i'm writing didn't happen. tax is going to be in the clear, I'll even get a lil' sumfin sumfin back, and I'm gettting some nice lil' travel jobs sending me up the coast again the next two weekends. add that to a pair of wolfmother shows i should end up working, and the Sexpo is coming around again, always good for a laugh.

that and I'm around to watch Smallville tonight, gold. I'll start putting a little more effort into this, cos i'm starting to get bored of the celebrity blogs.

Coff It Up!

2006-06-28T14:20:00.000+10:00

I've signed up for a long stocktake shift two weekends away, where I'll get paid for the 12-hour return trip, and probably suffer a 12 hour shift while I'm there. really, sitting here at the computer every day is driving me a bit mad. it's been weeks since I've gone out and hung out with the guys, but what really stings is the months that have passed since a girl who didn't even tell me her name kissed me.

the jobs I do don't really require much human contact, and I've been meaning to rectify that by joining up with the local rovers. problem is, I don't know where they are. they'd be cool people - all scouts are *cough* - but i'm pretty slow on the pick up with these kinda things.

Energy Trends And Implications

2006-06-26T16:45:00.000+10:00

I've discovered Senate and House Committee hearings on my thesis
topic, and they're shaping up to be awesome sources of information. at least if you don't mind the republican bias, or can ignore it. But I'm finding it hard to find evidence for the idea that US went to war and the pipeline through afghanistan changed its route. it's really quite critical, but where are you going to find the Taliban's committee hearings on energy? in english? or China admitting to being outmanouvered by the US? something tells me the Commies aren't above editing history online...

Photo taken somewhere around enmore, another lovely little stencil. don't know how I'm gonna stay up to watch the game tonight...

I Am Become Death, Destroyer Of Worlds

2006-06-23T22:51:00.000+10:00

god, i finally get it now. well, i found it anyway. apparently it's a line from the Hindu holy book, Bhagavad-Gita, which Oppenheimer claimed he was thinking about when he watched the first Nuclear explosion. The Director of the Manhattan Project. that guy. In one of these alt-history books I obsees over there's an Admiral who has the line in his cabin somewhere, and i always thought it was cool, but now I know how relevant it is. another line from the book;

If the radiance of a thousand suns were to burst at once into the sky, that would be like the splendor of the mighty one...

Woah.

Do You Guys Remember...

2006-06-22T19:26:00.000+10:00

Sam Buckingham? well, she's just released an album, and I'd like to check it out sometime. broke ninety hearts back in in the early years, but I was never sure what happened to her till I searched our grade on www.myspace.com. check it out, and add me. it'd be nice to have a proper networking thing, blogging doesn't seem to have the same effect... although it could. If you've got IE7, it's too bloody simple to add a feed, and know who has updated their site without having to check every one of them and see ancient posts from months back. I swear I'll get back into it, despite the incredible lack of news.

actually, i was thinking in bed last night, starin' at the ceiling, remembering when I used to have a belly full of fire, and how disheartened I've become that the revolution hasn't come. I didn't even buy free-range eggs today, if that's any indication of how much my ideals have fallen by the wayside. besides spending near on $60 on slabs of dead things. would've been enough to make vegetarian me retch.

Seems sometimes like I don't do anything for me. I do things for the image of me. Keegan the vegetarian political student. he's doing honours, how smart is that? he's got a job at the horden, gets to see the white stripes and has got enough money to go out every once in a while. lives in kensington, right next to his brother's uni, isn't that nice?

nah, that's not it really. i do honours because I wanted that classroom feeling again, where the room is silent because they want to hear what I have to say. I eat meat again cos I never got very good at vegetarian cooking. Horden's the cushiest job when it's on, and I did quit when i had something that paid better. I don't go to church because it isn't right for me. not yet. and not when it's like Hillsong.

Woah!

2006-06-12T11:46:00.000+10:00

Okay, I need at least of youse to come with me to Butterfingers, supported by MC Lars and TZU. this Friday 16th June, entry is $23.30. It'll be fuckin sweet, but I won't go on my own, and I really wanna go. essay's'll be finished and handed in that day, this'd be a really killer way to celebrate.

Coffee, Chocolate, Yet Still...

2006-06-08T16:09:00.000+10:00

Argh, study is so hard... Deadline means I'm about 1000 words a day minimum to stay ahead of the game, but I'm just not there, it's unbelievably frustrating not to be writing at the peak of my skills, like the essays i turned out near the end of last semester. instead, I'm clutching at straws, turns of phrase so inept and out of place it's a pain to read. blech.

oh, and don't buy the nescafe instant short black. they suck. but seeing as i'm the sucker, guess i'll have to get through the... ah shit. i can't even think of that word. bottle? jar! that took me half a minute.

i'd be slightly happier if pay for working on monday was in like it should be, instead of rocking up in another fortnight. 17 days is too long to wait.

Fresh (And Enduring) Props To...

2006-06-01T11:31:00.000+10:00

Fresh props for Nikki for her new adventures in blogging, and Enduring props to Linz for interesting and sustained blogging. super props to Mega Tokyo for long time distraction from important Uni work.

I'm sitting on the floor of the library next to a powerpoint, this place which has normally been the Uni equivalent of a deserted western town, now swarming with engineering students cramming for exams.

People Talkin At Me, Can't Hear A Word They're Sayin'

2006-05-30T18:01:00.000+10:00

Album of the Weekend: Jose Gonzalez - Veneer.

Peeps Actually Bloggin' Again: Jase and Erin.

Last Movie I Saw: Clerks.

That Song On The New iPod Ad: Wolfmother - Love Train.

Cost of 2 New Tees from Jay Jays: $25

Amount of change in my wallet after buying shirts: $14

Cost of Vegies for Thai i'll be cooking in 12 minutes: $14.35

Fee for using my card to buy veges: $2

Time spent finding links for this post: 20 min.

Plug For The Day

2006-05-29T12:07:00.000+10:00

I've been watching a fair bit of south park recently, because of this site, which has episodes as really small real media files. quality's not that great, but then again it's not much of an issue when it comes to south park. It's really at it's best when it's absolutely fresh, but there's still a lot of entertainment to be had in a show that's grown as much as south park has.

Aww, Dammit!

2006-05-28T21:04:00.000+10:00

So I just got back from X-Men 3: The Last Stand, and boy howdy was that an awesome movie. really, sometimes you just want to go see something blow up, and cool powers is just a bonus. however, I am still kicking myself because I waited till after the movie to read the review from Pajiba, just in case I got any more spoilers than those that people yelled at me, and dammit, I find out that I should've stayed till after the credits.

just found out what the secret scene was thanks to a random forum, and it's good to know. If you haven't seen it yet, you probably should stick around for after the credits. God, trash is just plain good sometimes.

Birthdays They Come And Go

2006-05-24T20:34:00.000+10:00

I celebrated the first anniversary of my 21st Birthday yesterday, waking up with a nice message from Ash, and spending most of the day running about not getting much done at all. there was a sprinkle of messages in the rest of the morning, but it only really emphasised the lack of messages from others, and the annoyance at myself for feeling like I needed messages. I've worked almost too much this past fortnight, but despite a bit of a splurge on books on Sunday, I'll still squeak by rent for another fortnight, with enough to satisfy the hungry beasts at Optus. I've got 10,000 words due in three weeks, but I'm not stressed enough to do much about it. really, this is probably a low end of the emotional cycle, perfectly matched to the weather, and synching well with my birthday.

I'm not writing this to guilt anyone, because I didn't sell the idea of my birthday, and I never did want much attention for them at school. Everyone's just as self-centric as I am, and it was good to have a day to reflect on what being 22 is about, what 5 years of Uni will do to an individual, and just which country I'll have to teach english in for 6 months to become a quality candidate.

Blues are thrashing Reds at the moment, but it's hard to get excited about such a drag of a game. World Cup and A-League, c'mon already.

So much to tell you!

2006-05-18T23:35:00.000+10:00

I've just come back from an awesome restaurant in glebe where I got to smoke a Hookah with a bunch of honours students and our professor. so great to have that kind of conversation going on around me, and to share it with the cute girl who looked even cuter and drove me home. omg. yuh-huh.

very different time last night at the Sarah Mcleod concert (right), which was quite awesome, really good new stuff she was bringing out in this intimate setting, like grooving out in someone's loungeroom. of course i had to go with the lesbian ex, and i felt like the token male in a room full of girls in love with sarah. still, it feels like in two days i've done more in the city than in two months. great times. really feeling the vibe of the city, it's something entirely different to the coast.

and i love it.

Sex is a lot like...

2006-05-17T11:46:00.000+10:00

it's been a while, so theories change relative to the closeness to the subject. Today it struck me, it's a lot like Covers, bands playing other bands' songs. for the most part it's dingy pub band covers of standards, the same track listing every week (down the Miami end of CCLC). It doesn't sound that great and after the novelty of the first time wears off, it gets pretty bloody boring, and you just hope to god that this time they'll do something original, but they never do.

Then you have punk covers, Me First and the Gimme Gimmes being the best at this, who remake work to the point where it's fun everytime, you always want to get into it and sing along, because you get so much simple pleasure out of it.

at the top of the line, Sarah Blasko covers Don't Dream It's Over by Crowded House, and you just hope that once in your life you can make such beautiful music, and share it with someone special.

but this could be applied to regular music, so why Covers? because it's already been done before. someone, somewhere has sung the same song you sing out. how good your cover of the original sin is entirely up to you.

Downtime.

2006-05-15T22:38:00.000+10:00

I headed down the coast on Sat to join the crew for Erin's Birthday, and I'm thinking the sensible thing would've been to stay at home. I got convinced to stay out after we left troppo around 2am, by which time I'd already sent the rainbow serpent soaring, and sobered up. Although, not enough. Parinoia about the Pulse Club, a place where you wouldn't want to go to sober, or leave drunk. and heading back to Mojos, well, I'm ever more convinced that the only safe course towards a good night is to steer away from Gosford.

seriously. I've been living in Kenso for over a year now, and I've been out down the coast than I have round here, but hey, you gotta take what you got.

Crappy Dinosaur 'Rock'

2006-05-10T22:44:00.000+10:00

last two nights I've been working at the Horden for Deep Purple (Smoke on the Water) and Status Quo (Rockin' All Over The World). it's the first time i've seen seats on the floor of the hordern, and with good reason. normal music the punters are keen enough to mosh, but this trash, well, you'd expect to be paying $20 to see them at Wyong RSL. So glad there weren't bars on the inside, and I was as far from the music as I could get, and we got let out before we had to listen to the whole Deep Purple set.

I read in one of the Street Rags that Status Quo saw Spinal Tap, and walked out on it because they thought the movie was parodying them. Except they suck harder than Spinal Tap.

Mashed Music

2006-05-09T22:34:00.000+10:00

I've been into this stuff for a while, on and off. there was a site back on the day where people posted mash-ups of Eminem's 'My Name Is' back when it just came out, there's the proof on the ancient hard-drive, that dusty old P-III.

but about a month ago, Kev came across this really good Mash, 'Boulevard of Broken Songs', and these past couple of days I was actually bored enough to check out the link that was in the comments section of the mp3, leading to the 'Composer of the Work' as one might say in yr12 english. Party Ben evidently has the skills, and is part of the growing Mash Scene in San Francisco, with real night clubs that play Mash. he had some links to a couple of other artists, including McSleazy, who produced a couple of mashes for the recent Banderas movie that bombed (it wasn't the music, i swears), and a bunch of folks out of Perth, Team 9, and on that site I found a link to a mp3 Blog Aggregator, which I'm so using tomorrow to download piles and piles of remixes.

Yes, there are free mp3s available on all the above links. the legality of mashes is in disputation, but seeing as they're not being sold for profit, and there's the possibility that art is taking place, it's a nice fuzzy grey area for the meantime. Oh yeah, before I sign off, a last mention of The Grey Album by Dangermouse, the current hot producer (Gnarls Barkley, anyone? god, listen to triple J for like half an hour, PLEASE).

Anyway, check some of it out, you might like something. If you're reading this, I know you're slacking off.

What Is That Thing?

2006-05-07T10:22:00.000+10:00

Ever felt the urge to drink your shower water? dont. something's wrong with our hot water system and i just got a chance to look inside... at the algae that loves the warm water. cold showers for a couple of days then. how invigorating.

She Was On The Bus.

2006-05-06T15:33:00.000+10:00

She'd taken my breath away the few times I'd seen her last year, and she'd gone back to byron for the summer, but she's probably back at the uni down the road cos as I was coming back from the Grates show, she got on the bus and was sitting up the front, she couldn't see me though. and I was wondering the whole way weather or nto to say hi, and it kinda stuck that even though I like her, and she'd likely be mildly pleased to see me, there'd be little point to it.

She's got faith. I've got realism. Religion and Politics, along with Sex, make up the taboo dinner table subjects, and from there, there's little else to talk about. when we tried, there were two big pink elephants in the cinema with us, desperate to be heard.

I'm not quite sure what kind of religious convictions I have, but I'm absolutely convinced that if I went to church, it wouldn't be for the right reasons. It's hard to listen to the polemic when I'm spending a couple of hours a day studying politics, a place where little optimism survives the endless grind of history. Carpenters get killed by opressive regimes everywhere, every year. they were all god's children, and they were all good people. they made what miracles they could, spread what love they had, and still they are tortured, and killed.

I'm not going to change anything by singing any damn songs about how god loves rich people with the time to go to hillsong to try and pick up. I might make a difference - might - if I keep the study up, write my own damn book, teach some kids to give a damn about what they're studying, or get a job somewhere I matter.

I'm not going to lie to myself, or her. I'm just going to sit quietly and get off at my stop.

A Grate Show

2006-05-06T13:54:00.000+10:00

Went to The Metro last night with kev and his girl to check out The Grates, supported by I (Heart) Hiroshima and another support band that was so irrelevant that for the life of me I can't remember who they were. the energy of these two bands was just incredible though, fast bouncin' pop/rock that makes you wish you'd had a few more and the people you were with wanted to dance as well. I (Heart) Hiroshima's female drummer was absolutely mental, providing half the lyrics and almost all of the energy, and the only dissapointment from them was getting back home in time to catch their video on rage, which failed to show just how great a live band they are.

after half an hour with the curtain down, The Grates funk out on stage, and kept it all goin' on all night long. hundreds of balloons descended from the roof, really felt like the fun of a kids' party for all us over 18's, especially with the red-cordial induced energy of the lead. awesome night for $20.

should see more live shows.

Uni Time

2006-05-04T12:05:00.000+10:00

well, shiny new laptop works well with wireless, even if service pack 2 is taking a while to download. gives me a chance to insist you check out Colbert's Speech at the White House Press Dinner. slagging off President Bush right to his face, god it's priceless. even got mentioned in class, although that's to be expected by a bunch of politicos once we've meandered far, far off topic. really far. there's probably a million places you can find it, but look through Milk And Cookies, and you'll also find Bush giving a speech with an impersonator right next to him. wonderful stuff, have to see to belive.

Also I got my Bachelors in the mail today, and I checked out my credit rating... appears i got a credit average at Club Mac without ever getting a Credit Mark. huh. really makes you think, think i should get back to study. would be nice to not have wasted this year.

So This Chick Right,

2006-05-02T21:59:00.000+10:00

Y'know, I turned off the TV, sat down at the computer, decided I was going to write about the girl from troppo, and then decided nup. I don't like being turned on. and I don't have to write 'bout it neither. Uni's back tomorrow, and I'm going to be a teched up student with a laptop and an iPod and too much time and not enough cash.

actually, with about 9000 more words to be written and fine tuned by the 17th, I don't really have that much time.

but no, I didn't come on here to complain. no axe to grind. oh that's right, I'm here to plug Super Nintendo. Games that I don't spend hours on at a time, and I get back to writing after thrashing out a Mario level. try Cool Roms, get yourself an emulator first though. the one I'm using now's the same one I had on the pentium III, back in high school. just cos it ain't new, doesn't mean it ain't fun.

State Corona Court

2006-05-01T18:53:00.000+10:00

On my way to a job interview at Telstra Stadium tonight, with my brother driving, I noticed some street art next to the State Coroners Court, above the scaffolding. A rather tasteless tag compared to some of the commissioned works you see around the city, but it reminded me to mention Banksy to y'all who still read this. I'm quite the fan of stencil work, particularly when it's done well, and Banksy is one of London's most notorious.

Theres a couple of good stencils around town, if you spend enough time walking about. the one above is by the side of centennial park near bondi junction, and it's near a couple of Howard stencils, with slogans like 'liberal with the truth'. there's a Darth Vader one down my road, across from Ikea which I never seem to manage to go down and look at properly. Newtown's great for street art, down the little alleys from the main strip, where there's usually a work commissioned by the business, and then the scrawls around it.

I had a good look into street art for a little while, after seeing this video of some dudes actually tagging air force one. well, making a video that looks like they did. Mostly as a distraction though. like this is. I'll cook something, watch a little teev, then get back to study, I swears.

Fortnight of Fortitude.

2006-04-30T20:45:00.001+10:00

I've purposely kept away from the blog for this short break from uni, though I've no idea why. perhaps so there'd be something to write about. and guess what, there is!

you might've noticed a post down below which has been scrubbed because a certain company didn't like me showing another certain company's upcoming trade secrets. which looked awesome and tasty, and if you msg me, i'd be glad to show you. because it's a whole other thing that way.

two weeks also meant time to collect a few images to post, including the one above, of a Neon Bulb Cross in Hyde Park over the Easter holiday. I didn't know enough about it, wether it was art or a particularly tasteless church, but it was still something that caught the eye. captivating.

There were two nights of drinking, one which ended with me blacking out, and another stealing a few kisses that weren't rightfully mine. sure were tasty though.

I've worked more than I should, which at least meant stocking up the fridge and the electricity account, if not the wardrobe like I would've liked to. but as the Dali Lama tells me, stuff won't make you happy. Though I sure seem pleased with myself and the shiny new nano, the refurbed Laptop, and papa did get a new pair of shoes.

Uni's back this week, and there's just a little over two weeks before 10,000 words have to be presented. study is due, and study I shall. just not right now. tomorrow's going to be rough enough as it is.

2:19 am... All Keyed Up.

2006-04-15T02:20:00.000+10:00

Woah. I've been up on my own for two straight hours now after getting home from work, and I'm not slowing down in the slightest. but suprisingly, this buzz is a lot like a High - it feels important, but there's the voice in the background telling you it' s not.

basically, I want a lot of people to read my other blog, which i'm now callign a serialized novel. (http://thelastparty.blogspot.com/) It's up to 3000 words now, the equivalent of a third year essay, only it's lacking the polish that a good critiquing could accomplish. I'm desparate for someone to pick every fucking nit in this story, because there's a lot in there that could be refined. It'll have to be refined at some point, and i'd prefer it to happen during the week when I can fix it up straight away.

that means you.

Post a comment, please, tell someone else about it - as a story about high school. I know I'm only writing to a small circle, but as much as I love you guys, I want more. I can't tell if this story's worth continuing with, but I'm gonna keep working at it.

I just hope youse keep reading it, and keep getting others to read it.

Your Own Personal Jesus

2006-04-10T21:13:00.000+10:00

I've got five parts of The Last Party done now, and it's pretty fun. this last part was from a different perspective, and it seems to throw people, although they get it on the second reading. still, it's a good challenge, and it's a good break from study when I'm actually studyin.

It also means that this blog's falling behind in importance to me, as less and less happens in real life that seems worth putting down on paper, as it were. Uni's continuing unabated, I'm scarcely getting out as much as I should, and domestic life is comfortable. I'm slowly getting through all the government applications as best I can, and I'm pretty comfortable now about not being with anyone. when it happens, it happens.

maybe things'll occur, but till then... read http://thelastparty.blogspot.com/

Coming Soon From ********

2006-04-01T20:35:00.000+11:00

This Post has been Removed because they said to. even though i get like three hits a day, but that's the deal.

Better Get A Lawyer Son...

2006-03-31T09:09:00.000+11:00

Hah, I'm a terrorist again. i got called up on the bus, because apparently the Americans aren't playing properly, and there was a dozen roles left untended this time round in the simulation. So Al-Zarqawi is back: and this time it's personal. The Americans are meaningless in this latest wave of sectarian violance, and the aim here is to expand the Sunni Territories to include this groovy little oil field in the north east of baghdad. blow up a mosque or two, a bit of a Shi'ite Pogrom, and before you know it, Sunni Arabia will be the richest state to emerge from the ashes of Iraq. groovy.

At the same time, I'm Prime Minister of Israel. no, there's no conflict of interest at all, what the hell are you on about? Just because i'm pushing for a west bank withdrawal... It's pretty odd being in government, but I could get used to this. especially when i've got the other parties begging to join a coalition. with me? you all want to be my friend? of course, they want something else, but hey, who doesn't?

I'm keeping up the Last Party too, already written 350wds of the next entry. it's 500 a pop, if you were wondering.

Kan-yeh West (Or are you a Plastic?)

2006-03-26T23:32:00.000+11:00

Fuck i love being a student with random jobs that bring awesome nights like this. Beautiful night, the violins were inspired, if it was at the opera house it would've been the perfect moment for hours long. there was two sets really, because half way thru Kanye said 'that was the intro, this is where I usually start the show' - and he pumps out the hits. Gold Digger went off, as it would, but there was so much to funk to. let's stick together, dilated peoples - this way, jay z's H to the Izzo, the stuff he's produced thru the years, these small moments for those who get that shit. like me. funkin back in the bar.

only one spark, but it held. she had these magical blue eyes, and she drank champagne. ah, one moment in a hundred, many others making my hairs stand on end - the violin version of diamonds from sierra leone, the crowd was awestruck. they could sure hit Elanore rigby for the single 'lonely people'.

I never want to grow up.

New Thing To Stick To.

2006-03-26T13:11:00.000+11:00

http://thelastparty.blogspot.com/

I said I would, and I have. check it out.

Linz, buzz me if you want something to do, Jase, comment on accuracy, and everyone else, it's a work of fiction. FICTION. it just looks a lot like it's real. it's going to get real inaccurate later down the line.

200th Post!

2006-03-25T16:37:00.000+11:00

Aren't You Impressed?? I Am! I've kept this thing going longer than any one diary i've written in, and I've changed a lot from the first post. gotten older for a start. less radical. Once a vegetarian, now a maccas'n'coke guzzlin' Student in his fifth year. I'm living out of home, without a girlfriend, on youth allowance, and god it's good. building to my left is the Metro Woolworths. very much in the foreground.

But anyway, there was probably something worth posting about before the numbers hit me... oh yeah, Bloody Fox. this film i've been obsessing about Nochnoi Dozor (Night Watch), and the incredible subtitling effects it had in the cinema, which made me wait all this time until it came out on DVD... and to my frustration, a bloody dubbed version, or in russian without the cool subtitles. what exactly am I complaining about?

The story was enhanced by the effect of the subtitles. already a strange world, the strange language is made comprehensible by what you read on the screen. a boy with a bloody nose in the pool is called by an erethral voice, and the words form from the red mist in the water, and fade away again. a warrior of light calls to his comrades below him on the bridge, and the words drift down to them. a Crowded train is full of people muttering at the madman rushing past, and their words pop out everywhere at once, and fade into the blurring cacophony of noise. Ain'titcoolnews.com said it gave it a comic book feel, and it sounds about right.

the white words scrolling across the bottom of the screen are as lifeless as the zombies in every other film I see.

Giving into Capitalism.

2006-03-22T19:08:00.000+11:00

Plug of the Month: Pure Profile. Since January, I've earnt $29 by doing surveys, and it's getting paid into my account in the next 21 days. that brings it up to $100 from them.
wondered what this picture's all about? guessed what it is yet? okay, Give Up.

Dad's doing well, those of you who I mentioned it to will understand.

the other thing i was thinking of doing is setting up another blog where I'll force myself to pump out 500 words every sunday on the Party. something like a serial. sounds like i'm goin' ta have ta whine to linz agin.

Steady As She Goes...

2006-03-20T12:43:00.000+11:00

Hmm. Quite an Intriguing Week. well, three nights out in a row will do that to a mind. It all started with the cruise on thursday, where i was mercifully abandoned to my fate aboard a ship full of friendly chiros, with a hat that landed on half the heads of the ship by the end of it. I got to talking to two very lovely ladies, though both were very much off limits. still couldn't put a dampener on the night, so great to talk to strangers.

Something that never happens at Troppo - Saturday's night was an adventure into the traditional meat market, where the crowd is endlessly sizing up the possibilities - and before you know it, you are too. talking only to people I hadn't seen in nearly five years, the point being that I knew them before I went in. however, the night wasn't a total failure - the experiment with public transport was a complete success, and it meant some bargain drinks at Woy Woy, with an hour's recovery time. however, Saturday still followed friday, and the third day just didn't have a decent vibe.

Especially compared to the joys of the Lowenbrau in the Rocks. mein got, vot a vunderful pub. of course, details remain a little sketchy, having drunk at least seven beers before I left with my brother's entourage to the destination, but I do remember a kiss, a tiny candle-flame of a memory that I cup my hands around, and spy on when i need reminding that there are beautiful moments in the world. to counter the clearer memory of having to get off the bus at fox, and expel the rainbow serpent that was writhing about in my belly. But I had a hand to hold on the walk back, which was quite pleasant.

Oh well, back to grind, that dream of an iPod Nano remaining as elusive as ever. something that would be possible without nights like these.

Like A Summer Rose..

2006-03-13T19:35:00.000+11:00

So I've got facial hair for the purposes of a fancy dress cruise. Growing a 'stash, Knoll, and a chin warmer has only become possible thanks to the distinct lack of employers who care about how dishevelled their uni students look. I'm hoping I can pull off a jack white look .

So had a fantastically simple night out with Jase and Bec, meeting the mysterious 'luke and amy' and co., friends of Kim and Brian. Jase's Bright Idea (pictured), while at the Empire Bay Hotel. There were some decent sorts about, suprisingly, but we'd neither game nor gumption. maybe more luck up in Kuri Kuri next sat, if anyone else is game. Friday's out because I'll be. Out. In the city, celebrating Kev's Birthday/St. Patricks' Day. I should be saving my energy and doing some study while I can this week...

For The Record...

2006-03-09T22:19:00.000+11:00

uh, some might've taken that last one the wrong way. I'm not gay. I like to [blank] women. when i'm getting my [blank] [blanked], I want to be able to fondle a pair of [blanks], not a pair of [blanks]. I enjoy [blanking] [blank] on a woman, even if i'm not completely sure what I'm doing, it's still infinitely better than [blanking] a [blank]. and the thought of [blanking] my [blank] into her [blank] is way more appealing than the thought of [blanking] a guy in the [blank]. Sure, it's nice getting attention paid to me by the nicest folk in the world, the gays, but it's nothing compared to that little fire of hope when a girl looks at me and i'm wondering does she? doesn't she? maybe this time?

Which is why I'll pay to go on a cruise full of drunken female chiros, but you have to pay me, and pay me well to work on a bar for 13 hours. if it's a fun shift, fine, but I'm not giving out my number and you've got a snowball's in hell of getting some lovin'.

looking east on town hall corner.at another time of the day, it could be done without the pole, might look a little better.

2006-03-08T21:39:00.000+11:00

So I think i might try and do this once or twice a week, i was suprised at how good a phone photo could look. It's from the bus stop at QVB, and I had this real feeling of a zombie movie for a couple of minutes while I waited for a bus, so i thought i'd try and capture it.

Also, I have to bitch about this fucking dude who goes around asking people if they have two bucks. he's asked me like five fucking times this year, and I really want to slug him one because it's such a fucking con. I mean, he's not even giving a story, he's just asking for money. If i'm ever living on the streets (very unlikely), I'd do better than that. next time, I'm gonna think of something really smart to say.

Another thing today is how odd this attraction to this girl is. She's even got a remarkably similar thesis topic, and I know how unlikely it is I'll ever meet someone that interested in what I'm interested in... but... no I can't even write this one. it sounds plausible and stupid at the same time. and I just wanted to put the photo up anyway.

so enjoy!

Sane Again

2006-03-07T11:31:00.000+11:00

There was a post I wrote on sunday, after around 25-26 hours of being awake, including a 13 hour shift at the Hordern which I walked to and from. After which I went to the Grand Final, which eventually brought my time up to 33 Hours Without Sleep. so yesterday I wasn't much improved, but today I'm getting there. That means, if the laundry would stop flooding into the kitchen, things'd be just peachy.

I'm just hanging around for the plumber to come (sometime around 2-4), and wondering just how accepting of gayness my friends are... This Mardi Gras was the fifth gay event I've worked, and there's a few enduring perceptions:

1) at least someone thinks I'm cute
2) when people think you're cute they're very nice to you
3) when people are nice to me I get quite flirty
4) I need a regular job at a nightclub with that kind of atmosphere.

I also would like to be earning enough to be able to go out once in a while. but them's the breaks, I chose to stick to honours, so by gumption i'm gonna finish this thing.

" # SHowed Barnes this DiarY. fool."

2006-03-02T21:28:00.000+11:00

-excerpt from week ending Sunday 20th August 2000.

I like the bits in this thing that were relevant then, but are incomprehensible now. also the horrific playlists:

when doves cry

kung-fu fighting

you sexy thing

it's my life

Tubthumpin'

(August 22nd)

and WOW. the things you completely forget. and it emphasises why the FICTIONAL party is more realisitic if it's as limited in attendance as I portray it. "# Haydens Party - I dind't Go. 120 people @ Hight" (July 31st). we never achieved that. not even close.

Hah. getting 2/3rds of a song on napster was worth writing about, apparently.

Six years on, however, and I got frustrated by uni again, but I will have class tomorrow. and breathe out. a gorgeous hour each way on an airconditioned bus with nothing to do but read and admire the inevitable beautiful woman aboard. a wander through the city morning and night, it feels like home more and more. the coast is becoming a distant holiday, the same way that hawks nest didn't really feel the same. it really lacked the bubbly person who keeps the conversation going, though we did have our moments, like on the dune. but then again, we were always a quiet bunch, as the diary will attest to.

I had a spiel which would have been written for jenna's eyes, but i'm quite at one with the world right now, and can't summon up the energy to lay it out. it's there though. just not tonight.

Walk Softly...

2006-02-27T21:28:00.000+11:00

And Carry A Big Fucking Stick. After the day I've had, i'm treading cautiously around my subconscious, before it wakes up and takes my aluminium baseball bat to that 68cm TV on the Kerb outside the house. man, there's nothing like laying waste to a grey TV screen for working out some of the tension of a messed up day. I'm glad there was a beer here, cold and waiting for me. I didn't get to sleep till 4am this morning, and then I spent the whole day reading steven king's Cell and scared that everyone would turn into zombies, and doing little else because of the messed up timetable skills of Honours, the Soviet style inefficiencies of Club Mac, and enduring the un-airconditioned buses that will be my tomb for 6+ hours a week every week.

god i want to tear that TV a new one.

Georgeous Eyes

2006-02-23T17:40:00.000+11:00

Everyone should have a diary like this one. The Cover of the original school blue is hidden behind dozens of stickers - Hahn Premium, Tooheys Pils, Strongbow, Smirnoff, Stolichnaya, even Kirov. Pages are falling everywhere, and there's a couple of photos tucked away. inside, the words are densely packed together, and very often they are out of any sort of context. there's some gems of obvious rumour, some confessions, and a lot of anger (I was a teenager, after all).

There are quite a few pieces that I don't want anyone to ever get close enough to look at. hence this book is a private thing. then again, there's somethings that are special for undefinable reasons. There was a group activity we were forced to do, sat down in random groups of people in our year that we might not normally hang out with. and in one of these we wrote down a compliment for each other. one of the cute girls in the year wrote the title for me, and though for the life of me i can't remember who she was, that she wrote it was one of those things that you hold onto for a long time.

I Want To Write This Thing More Than Ever.

Patience Seeking A Better Post

2006-02-21T14:56:00.000+11:00

Today it's more about what I'm not writing - it's a very different post to what I'd have written the moment I got back from Hawks Nest. While I love my friends, I've become very attached to living alone, with my brother. Not being in a couple, it has it's upsides. and I could see that in this place where there was a lot of stress being in a couple in previous years.

on a baser level, it's the cost of a relationship I can't afford while I'm at Uni. I've barely got enough to feed/house myself, get to uni and back, without being slugged for $25 to see a movie ($30 with popcorn), dinner, dancing, taxi. even sitting at home watching dvds, or going to the beach, is an extravagance beyond my meager means. it also puts other luxuries out of reach - that new steven king book about zombies which i'd like to read, the dvds of serenity/firefly, or even a mp3 player for the two hour trips to uni.

that's not to say if it happens, i can't make it happen, just that I won't be able to give it all i'd want to. somethings deserve better than a half-assed effort.

Can't Think Straight

2006-02-04T16:23:00.000+11:00

must be that time of the month again... I'd love to find that article again, the one on a scientific study where men and women were asked to keep a mood diary, and it found that not only did men have a monthly mood cycle, but the mood swings were greater than the womens. we just try to hide it more, most of the time. I'm more objective about it now than I might've been at 17, when some days I'd be so moody I... did lots of things. none of which involved human contact.

And i guess i still do that, only I'm not feeling that bad this time round. that's mainly because of the excitement of going to Hawkers, but the combination of both has just ripped my mind out of the time it's meant to be in - August 2000. I can't write a word in without it feeling like it's from the now, or really about the holiday, or about Ez. Yes, a year on and and still think about her every day. Learn from the past and all that, but this summer has just reminded me how boring summers are without a girlfriend, school/uni, or regular work. ah, melancholy. at least I picked up once this summer. can still feel it in the base of my skull, that primitive desire.

Do You Remember The Days...

2006-02-02T14:43:00.000+11:00

Okay, today's question - what kind of slang did we use around yr11 (2000)? I'm guessing 'sweet' and 'cool' are still continual staples, no matter what decade, but I'm hoping one of youse who reads this will remember some totally sweet and cool word, that was infinitely cooler and sweeter than cool or sweet.

There's a sweet westerly blowing a cool wind through the house right now, which might be enough to get me back to writing. I've only pumped out 1000 words this morning, and I'm still asking a lot of questions - I'm starting to realise how much of that time I can't really remember. More accurately, how much thinking it takes to remember small details. I'm settling on setting it in August, or September. It's going to take some diary investigation to figure out when that three week/olympics break was, but it's not as crucial as the emotions. too many damn hormones.

also props to Linz for that Chuck Norris bit. he's so cool, when you look up cool in the dictionary it says;

Cool - (n) - Chuck Norris.

Consumer Woes

2006-01-30T15:40:00.000+11:00

at least with the little vague buddhist reading i've done, I'm not stressed with desire, but wow x-boxes are cool, and i'm guessing the 360 will be even cooler. of course such a machine is out of my affordability range, and the ownership of one will do little to achieve inner peace, but playing Neil's on sat during that late night sure did improve my appreciation for a machine that you don't have to buy memory sticks for.

That and my appreciation for a night with the boys playing poker and the x-box, even if i did stay up to 4:30 in the goddamn AM having to listen to the slurping of one of the guys making out with one of Neil's Sister's Friends. at least I hope the slurping was only making out. I spent the rest of the morning upstairs.

What Was That About Getting Drunk?

2006-01-24T17:28:00.001+11:00

I want to write about my night last night but I can't because she reads this and I don't want to lie, or admit what it felt like. So i'll stick to I got very wasted, I spent almost all my money so BDO's going to be a sober event, and I woke up alone. again. like I always do. like I will tomorrow.

So I've Been...

2006-01-22T17:35:00.000+11:00

Watching this series called Entourage, about this up-and-coming movie star, his brother, and two of his friends from high school who live in a giant house, and go out and get laid every night. very sweet life. so here's the deal. there's three positions to be at - haven't made it, trying to make it, and made it.

for example, I haven't made it. I blog about how I've gotta save up three weeks worth of going out to have a holiday with my mates.

then there's the millions or so trying to make it. Jobs, Mortgages, Wives and all those other things that make up this kind of life.

This Series is a taste of what it would be like to be made. and if I can't have that, well the other two ain't so bad. I'm smiling, and I haven't had to bust my ass 9-5 to get this smile. A year down the line, and I might be lucky enough to get a dream job - that's making it for me. I'll be a Made Man. even if I'm stuck with a Mortgage, seeking a partner instead of a one-nighter. I'd rather the Prius than the Maserati.

I'm happy being content with what I've got.

Save Tonight, And Fight The Break Of Dawn...

2006-01-21T16:42:00.000+11:00

Two sides of a single coin, Night and Day. Two different people. Nothing matters at Night, it's something that the Day has to deal with. Consequences are Delayed, like the morning hangover following the night's reckless abandon.

Just itchin for hawkers....

Do You Really Want To Live Forever, Forever Young

2006-01-20T20:21:00.000+11:00

Pfft, I look back on every post and thing 'i coulda done that better', or 'what was I thinking?'. Money Issues. like anyone cares. I'm comfortable with my cash flow - I'm just getting bored sitting at home watching TV and playing computer games. ooh, i hear voices outside...

I'd be interested if I was 12.

So today, instead of stressing out about not doing anything, I looked at everything. I've got some shifts before Hawkers, Uni starts on the 27th of feb and the 3000 worder's not due till april. I've got my class times, so even if i don't know what i'm in for, at least i'll know where to be.

I'm also learning how much I need my friends, more than I need to go to the BDO. but too late to sell the ticket... maybe. I'll check ebay.

(5 Min Later)

... Tough Call. I'd make a loss of maybe $30... $100 in the hand or a whole day with some of the best talent I'll see all year... I have to go. It'll be awesome, but I'll be lonely within a crowd 55,000.

Silent Wednesday

2006-01-18T18:34:00.000+11:00

I'm on the razor's edge, balancing my budget on a tightrope for the next month. The eternal rent, the quaterly electricity, the monthly phone, and the semi-annual university cash grab. in between it all there's food, and in some possible way I have to get myself to Big Day Out, and Hawks Nest. Somehow it'll all work out, but it basically sums up to the end of summer as it was.

So I'm Trapped Here, hanging out for shifts that'll tip me over into the black. I've still got the occasional work (White Stripes are playing at the Horden the night before BDO), and Youth Allowance kicked up another $7 a fortnight. whoopee. While the bro's gone down to Newcastle, I'm guarding the fort, downloading HBO series and cheesy movies.